B/X class: Goblin

A B/X class for playing goblins as tinkers and trap-setters.

When I wrote up monster entries for some goblin variants I came to the conclusion that it would be a lot of fun to play one in a semi-serious game. Browsing for other people's take on the subject, I found interesting posts on The Treasure Hunter's HQ and Against The Wicked City. Treasure Hunter clearly feels that goblins and thieves overlap, while Wicked's goblin is a vile, mad little scrapper who'll bite you in the unmentionables. I love them both.

I also love Terry Pratchett's vision of goblins as grubby but mechanically-talented scroungers. And I'm unfairly prejudiced against gnomes (twee little shitcakes), so I want to steal that niche for goblins. My vision of the goblin shares elements from all three of those sources. I can imagine one of them leaning out of a steam train cab window, yelling "Show us yer tits!" and laughing evilly around a dog-end cigarette.

My goblin class is a mix of what I found at the two links above and a couple of ideas out of my own brain:

Goblin
Requirements: Minimum Dex 9
Prime requisite: DEX
Hit dice: 1d4
Maximum level: 12
Allowed armour: Leather, hide or filthy rags
Allowed weapons: Small or normal-sized
Languages: Alignment language, common, goblin, orc
Saves and level as per thief

Goblins are horrible green- or grey-skinned humanoids with pointed ears and noses. They average a height of three feet and live wherever tolerated. They live in bands, but solitary goblins will sometimes strike out on their own. They have a reputation as erratic, thieving public nuisances and vandals who love drink and petty crime.

Abilities

Darkvision to 60'.

Tinker: Use the cleric's turn undead table for this, where the GM's assessment of difficulty replaces the monster hit dice number.

• Disarm trap
• Success: trap only triggers on 1-in-6. Each character/NPC passing must roll.
• T: trap is inert, but goblin can instantly reactivate it.
• D: as T, or goblin can disassemble trap to gain 1d3 scrap.
  
  
• Set trap (requires 3 scrap)
  
•  Success: trap will affect one creature.
• T: trap has an area of effect.
• D: as T, or goblin can refine the mechanism to regain 1d3 scrap.
  
  
• Repair weapon/armour
•  Success: item is usable, but functions like a similar item one step lower (eg. d6 weapon does d4 damage, plate protects like chain, etc).
• T: item regains full function.
• D: as T, but the goblin adds spikes to it. Item is +1. Spikes have a 1-in-6 chance of falling off each time the item is used. (Requires 1 scrap.)
  
  
• Build weapon/armour (requires 3 scrap)
• Success: goblin builds a d4 weapon or a shield. It falls apart at the end of the next fight and becomes scrap again.
• T: item functions normally.
• D: as T, but with spikes on. Item is +1. Spikes fall off on 1-in-6.
  

 

Headstab: Similar to a thief's backstab ability. By dropping onto an opponent from above and hanging on, a goblin can make a number of attacks equal to its DEX bonus. Opponent may make a STR vs STR roll to dislodge the goblin on their round, otherwise another headstab attack can be made.

Eat anything: A goblin can live on almost anything that isn't fighting it right now. Allows forage rolls in dungeons and cities. If other party members attempt to eat what it finds, make a save vs poison. On success they gain the benefits of a ration. On failure they take -2 for the next turn as they vomit uncontrollably.

Snivel: By slumping and letting their noses drip pathetically, a goblin can appear to be harmless. Opponents will prefer other targets unless the goblin attacks them.

Mock: A goblin's taunting crosses the language barrier. It can say something or make a gesture to offend any intelligent opponent. GM determines how NPCs react.

The OSR is...

Ask ten people what the OSR is and you're likely to get 10 + 1d6 opinions for your trouble. So why ask? You can get those opinions and many more by rolling on the table below!

The OSR is made up of...
1. Old-school grognards
2. Wild-eyed rules hackers
3. Posing art-wonks
4. Fun-hating pedants
5. Mouldering grey-beards
6. Chattering children

playing...
1. Gary Gygax's Chainmail rules
2. un-houseruled OD&D
3. a heartbreaker ruleset from a particular weekend in 1970, preserved like a fly in amber
4. something new-school with an art style somewhere between psychedelic and heiroglyphic
5. an original ruleset that everyone agrees 'just feels' OSR (by which they mean their characters get killed a lot)
6. a Frankenstein's monster of rules that don't fit with each other, pulled from half a dozen of their favourite OSR titles

with...
1. Jeff Rients, passed out in a beanbag surrounded by copies of his carousing rules, occasionally mumbling "level fiddy, mudderfuckers"
2. SWORD DREAM tinkerers who want to replace all their stats with usage dice
3. six pear-shaped guys with real metal swords they forged from beer cans HEY WATCH WHERE YOU'RE SWINGING THAT
4. a couple who brought their teenagers because they can't be trusted at home alone
5. Dave Arneson's actual corpse
6. eight college students who still think this is 5E

and are 'led' by...

1. an elite group who've played in con games GMed by Gary G and have photographic evidence

2. a cabal of self-publishers who cracked the code for selling platinum on DrivethruRPG

3. a demented group who argue that Cops 'n' Robbers is the original RPG, but only if you didn't let girls play

4. scruffy basement-dwelling contrarians who just want to be in opposition to everyone

5. purists who don't play any game available in PDF or POD

6. nostalga-junkies who remember the 70s as a better time

but actually led by...

1. Rosicrucians

2. Freemasons

3. the Kickstarter board of directors

4. a rogue CIA cell locked in proxy combat with a rogue KGB cell since 1990

5. a millennial cult sifting the errors from millions of furiously typed forum comments for prophecy

6. Arnold K from a hidden base in the caldera of an active volcano commanding an army of crowdfunded drones armed with scalpels

with the goal of...

1. destroying storygames forever.

2. inoculating the next generation against social media-triggered political madness.
3. making a quick buck the hardest way.

4. assembling a critical mass of brain matter conditioned to simulate fantasy worlds. The harvest begins next year.

5. winning a bet.

6. sorry, only the even secret-er cabal knows that.

 

 

(Thanks to Spwack of the Slight Adjustments blog for the generator code.)

The Magic Items of Ha'Dwair

I'm pretty sure everyone who plays a fantasy RPG (and especially D&D-ish RPGs) comes to the realisation that to a medieval peasant a laser gun is a magic wand, a robot is a man in armour and a spaceship is a godly chariot. Of course, that would also apply to modern objects, not just futuristic ones.

The wizard of Ha'Dwair sells his wares from a hut of sparkling glass, filled with moving images and brightly-painted runes of obscure meaning. They're reliable, if heavy, and he makes sure to show customers how to use them safely and check for remaining charges and mana. He often seems confused about what adventurers are actually doing with them, but it's worth ignoring his eccentricities to deal with a wizard who is helpful, reliable and doesn't smell like weasels live in his clothes.

Wands

When a wand runs out of mana or charges, the wizard will re-empower it for a modest fee.

Maa-ki-tah's Wand of Iron Spikes

This wand produces iron spikes from nowhere. If held against a door frame, it can spike it open or shut instantly. It makes a noise like a dragon coughing, but quieter than a hammer. Triggers an encounter check.

If used in battle Maa-ki-tah's wand is only useful against opponents in plate, or carrying a shield, or encased in tough hide. It ignores AC and does 1d6 damage.

DeWalt's Disc-Axe *

At the end of this wand is a spinning disc with intricately-carved teeth along the edge. It's devastating in battle, but its main use is quickly making entrances and exits by cutting through wooden doors, walls, floors and ceilings. If used on metal, the disc is blunted until the user painstakingly files the teeth back to sharpness. Louder than an axe. Triggers an encounter check.

Rio Bi's Self-propelling Drill

Unlike an iron-worker's self-propelling drill, this wand doesn't need to be hand-cranked. The user simply places it against the surface to be holed and presses a stud, allowing for accuracy and speed. A perfect thief's tool, it can disable locks and create spy holes. The bit can be exchanged for one of a different size with nothing more than the twist of a key. It can be kept quiet if used gently, but makes stealth impossible.

Bosh's Excellent Portable Forge

The forge is made up a of a hand-pulled two-wheeled cart, a large metal flask and the hellfire wand. The cart is light but strong and can hold the weight of several people. The flask is cold to the touch but contains alchemist's fire. If dropped from a great height, it will rupture in an explosion like a dragon attack. The hellfire wand produces a hot, bright flame that melts through copper and tin in seconds and iron in minutes. The flame should not be looked at directly, hellfire is not kind to mortal eyes. A skilled smith can use it to repair damaged weapons and armour while delving.

Armour

The wizard of Ha'Dwair's armour isn't quite on the same level as his wands. In fact, a lot of it is near-useless. What good is armour that makes you more likely to be seen? Still, he often gives it away for nothing with a wand and it's not smart to refuse a wizard's gift.

The Rigid Helm

Someone wearing the Rigid Helm can withstand mighty blows to the top of their head. It offers much less protection against lateral attacks. Rub some mud on it, it's bright orange.

The Invisible Eye-Ward

Not actually invisible, but you can see through this light-but-tough protector like it was glass. Perfect for looking through keyholes that might contain poison needle traps.

Note: Not arrow-proof.

The Vest of Revealing

This vest offers no armour bonus at all, and it's a vivid yellow and orange so bright they seem to glow. Maybe you could slit it down the sides and drape it over the best-armoured member of the party to make them the focus of incoming attacks? There's no obvious benefit to it, but the wizard insists that everyone take one.

Gloves of Improved Grip

Thin gloves that protect like thick leather gloves, offering all the convenience of ‒ look, just take them. They're free. Take them.

Boots of Hardness

Ah, now these are something special! Boots that never slip on any solid surface and have iron caps stitched into the leather. Good for fighting kobolds, goblins and other scum that love to stab an honest fighting man in the foot.

* With thanks to William Hope Hodgson