Saturday 2 May 2020

Court of Apes

A bestiary of apes for a dungeon adventure because sometimes the solution is more monkeys.

Macaque Minister

Ever-mindful of their dignity, Macaques are the orators and speech makers of the court. They argue their positions with punctilious decorum, no matter how ridiculous they are.

"I admire the passion with which the honoured member advocates for socks to be worn inside-out, but has he considered the impact on the yarn-makers and dyers?"

AC 9 [11], HD 2 (5hp), Att 1 × rapier (1d6), THAC0 18 [+1], MV 120’ (40’), SV D13 W14 P13 B16 S15 (MU2), ML 7, AL Neutral, XP 60, NA 2d4 (1d6+2), TT B

Specials: 
Sleep - Once per day a Macaque Minister may cast Sleep on any number of creatures who can hear it. Requires a common language and an uninterrupted round of waffling speech. Save vs paralysis resists.
Climb - Can Climb as per a Thief of 3 levels higher.
Ambi-ambidextrous - Can wield a weapon as long as any limb is free.
Prehensile tail - Tail can be used to grip. Can hold the Macaque's and extra weight up to that of a Halfling.

 

Colobus Counsellor

Always ready to offer stupid advice, whether asked for it or not.

"M'lord, I can assure you we will save hours of the servants' time cleaning by simply diverting a river through the castle on alternate Wednesdays."

AC 7 [12], HD 2 (7hp), Att 1 × staff (1d4), THAC0 18 [+1], MV 120’ (40’), SV D11 W12 P14 B16 S15 (C2), ML 7, AL Neutral, XP 25, NA 1d4+2 (2d4), TT N

Specials:
Cure light wounds - Once per day a Colobus can examine a patient and pronounce a diagnosis "You're pregnant/You're dead/You have bees." and provide a tonic in the form of 'medicinal' brandy that restores 1d6+1 HP.
Escape - If attacked, a Colobus may disappear into its own baggy robes and emerge fleeing in an unexpected direction.

Gorilla Philosopher

Gorillas who spend their time debating schools of thought. They slam their fists on the ground, beat their chests, snort and shake their heads, but there's no actual violence.

"The sock question is fascinating and deserves careful consideration. Nevertheless, we are apes and apes have no feet."

AC 6 [13], HD 4 (18hp), Att 2 × slam (1d4) or 1 x logic (1d6 + paralysis, see specials), THAC0 16 [+3], MV 120’ (40’), SV D12 W13 P14 B15 S16 (F2), ML 7, AL Neutral, XP 80, NA 1d4+1 (2d4), TT O

Specials:

Logic - a Gorilla Philosopher may attempt to disprove an opponent's existence. Requires a common language. Attack uses target's Int modifier as a bonus. Success does 1d6 psychic damage and target must save vs paralysis or lose a turn while they doubt their own reality.
Snarl - Once per combat a Gorilla may vent a growl of animal fury and automatically gain initiative for its side in the following turn.

Gibbon Scribe

Gibbons bumble about looking for things to record. Any things.

"Hang about, hang about - what was that part about winding my entrails around the flagpole? And do you mind if I write 'guts'? It's easier to spell."

AC 9 [10], HD 1 (4hp), Att 1 × sharpened quill (1d4), THAC0 19 [+0], MV 120’ (40’), SV D11 W12 P14 B15 S16 (C1), ML 7, AL Neutral, XP 10, NA 1d6+2 (2d6), TT S

Chimp Guard

Slouching chimpanzees with chainmail and dented helmets, using spears to prop themselves up. They watch proceedings with a sleepy disinterest until it's time to leap screaming into battle.

"You saying I'm corrupt? 'Cos that's insulting and when I feel insulted it costs twice the usual fee to walk through this door."

AC 7 [12], HD 3 (14hp), Att 1 × sword (1d6) or spear (1d6), THAC0 16 [+3], MV 120’ (40’), SV D12 W13 P14 B15 S16 (F2), ML 7, AL Neutral, XP 35, NA 2d4 (1d6+2), TT K

Bonobo Page

Chimp-like apes in livery, carrying trumpets and scrolls. They announce visitors and shout the events of the court as they happen.

"Hear ye! Sir Reginald Montague Fineteeth throttles Lord Eustace Curlwhiskers with his tail! Lord Eustace responds via an attempted eye gouge with a fish fork! Lady Marjorie Goldenfur absconds with the last of the pastries!"

AC 6 [13], HD 2 (7hp), Att 1 × trumpet (1d4), THAC0 17 [+2], MV 120’ (40’), SV D12 W13 P14 B15 S16 (F2), ML 7, AL Neutral, XP 20, NA 1d6 (2d4), TT P

Good King Paul

A 7-year old human boy with a cloth tail stitched to his shorts and glued-on monkey whiskers. He shouts nonsensical commands and the apes hurry to carry them out while applauding his wisdom.

"I declare today cheese day! Everyone eat cheese!" "Urgh, cheese is yuck now. It makes me feel funny. Anyone with cheese shall be put to death!" "By royal decree, everyone walk backwards!"

AC 9 [11], HD 1/2 (2hp), Att 1 x kick (1d2-1) or 1 x bite (1d2-1), THAC0 16 [+3], MV 120’ (40’), SV D14 W15 P16 B17 S18 (NH), ML 6, AL Neutral, XP 5, NA 0 (1), TT I

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